'You better check yo self before you wreck yo self." - Ice Cube
Sometimes I need a reality check.
I've had my sticky hands in a lot of pots lately and my brain has been in overdrive with new ideas for my house, my family, my career, my life.
It's fun feeling the excitement of trying something new or working toward a reinvented goal.
I am overflowing with motivation and am squeezing the life out of every minute of the day. I might get burnt out soon, I need to slow down.
Changes, changes, changes.
Some people fear change, I embrace it. I get bored with things easily. I have to keep my brain busy or I start getting lazy. Lazy in a really bad, unproductive, in-a-funk kind of way.
I need to take a step back and take in what life is doing for me RIGHT NOW, in this moment.
What it boils down to is me, me, me. What I want. Not a bad thing, unless it starts consuming a person. Unless that person starts neglecting other important things. Things that are part of my present; part of my RIGHT NOW.
I think it's important to me to have a life outside of my job and outside of home. I wouldn't be a happy person inside and out if I didn't. But it's easy to get caught up in ME, wholly, entirely, all about me.
I read somewhere that when you love someone, you care about their wants over your own. Being selfless is the best way to love.
I'll admit, I have difficulty doing that even though I unconditionally love my husband and my son.
Time for a change.
Painting the house, restoring furniture, rebuilding a massage clientele, a new wardrobe, a new car, and reading 1000 books aren't benefiting my husband or my son in any way. I can work on these things, but I need to remember to work on things that will benefit them too.
I can count my blessings because my life is full of things I like and enjoy. I am not doing anything I don't like to do.
How many people can say that?
I'm satisfied with my life right now, but I want more. It's human nature.
Can I have my cake and eat it too? I think I can.
Just in moderation and all in good time.
"One moment of patience my ward of great disaster. One moment of impatience may ruin a whole life." - Chinese Proverb
2 comments:
That selfless love stuff? Bullshit. Don't let that bring you down. You can't take care of others unless you've taken care of yourself first. You can't love others unless you love yourself first.
I think that selflessness thing is akin to martyrdom.
Do you love your child so much that you will do anything for him? Of course. But you can't do for him if you are starved mentally, physically,emotionally,spiritually.
So take care of you, and you will be a better wife/mother/friend/whatever to everyone else!
I agree with you Jen. There is a time for everything. You do take time for yourself which is important but sometimes you have to give up some things because at this point in life there's just not room for all of it. Its all about balance. Thats just my opinion. Its a choice you make when you decide to me a mom and wife.
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